Resilience, Grit and Getting up When You’ve Fallen

What makes some people more likely to succeed?  Is it intelligence? Good fortune? Money?  All three of those things may certainly help, but successful people will tell you it's also something else.

You may call it resilience, grit, determination, tenacity, perseverance or courage. In this TED talk Angela Lee Duckworth discusses "grit" as the key to success.

Angela Lee Duckworth: The key to success? Grit



Explore the nature of success in this TED Talk with Tony Robbins.  Are we really seeking success? Or is it better to consider what it takes to have a meaningful and fulfilling life?  How do the resources available to us and the stories we tell ourselves about our experiences impact our lives?


Elizabeth Smart talks about overcoming adversity


Heroes of Hope: Building Resilience for America’s Children

Reposted from an earlier date

What do Jamie Lee Curtis, Cyndi Lauper, Goldie Hawn, Hershel Walker and Secretary of Health and Human Services Kathleen Sebelius have in common?  They have all been involved in shining a light on the importance of every child’s mental health.

Recently, I had the pleasure of interviewing Gary M. Blau, Ph.D., who is involved in wide variety of programs designed to improve the lives of children and families and who has been working to raise awareness about children’s mental health.

Tomorrow is National Children’s Awareness Day’s “Heroes of Hope Tribute” in Washington D.C. and I spoke with Gary about who is a “hero of hope” and why they are so important to our children.

I asked Dr. Blau to explain  the “Heroes of Hope” Tribute. In a fast and furious conversation brimming with information, I learned that bringing awareness to children’s mental health has been evolving for years.  This year SAMSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) has enlisted scores of individuals, agencies, organizations and supporters to help raise awareness about children’s mental health.   Cyndi Lauper, for example, will be recognized this year for work on behalf of homeless lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) youth through her foundation, the True Colors Fund.

It’s people like Cyndi who, along with others, such as celebrities, dignitaries, teachers, therapists, parents and neighbors, have helped children faced with trauma build resilience.  These caring people, “heroes of hope” have made a difference in a child’s life.

Dr. Blau related an example of a teen in Tennessee who’d struggled with trauma and subsequent mental health challenges.  With the support of a teacher and a caring counselor, her “heroes of hope,” this youngster is confronting the challenges she’s faced with resilience and will tell her story at a National Children’s Awareness Day Event.

What are the biggest mental health challenges children are facing today?

According to Dr. Blau, 1 in 5 (20%) of children face some kind of mental health challenge.  These challenges include a wide range of difficulties.  Children might face relatively straight- forward adjustment disorders to disorders with more complicated features, such as anxiety, depression, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) or attachment disorder.

“One in 10 children face more serious challenges,” said Dr. Blau.  These serious mental health conditions impact a child’s ability to function at home, school or in the community.  Many are involved in mental health services.

Dr. Blau emphasized that there is hope.  With the right kind of support and intervention children can and do recover.

This year, SAMSA will highlight issues that arise when children experience trauma.  Trauma can occur through abuse, life threatening injuries, violence in families or communities.  In the ACE study (a study on adverse childhood experiences), cited by Dr.Blau, the relationship between the number of childhood traumatic experiences and problems in adulthood, such as heart disease, physical illness and mental health problems, was clear.

Dr. Blau went on to say that the prevalence of childhood exposure to trauma is more pronounced than you would think, with 26% percent of children witnessing a traumatic event before the age of four.

How To Get Involved

Dr. Blau shared numerous links, including a link to SAMSA’s website, which has opportunities to engage in a community conversation and instructions on how to become a hero of hope. Through the website, you can learn how to work in your community, talk about children’s mental health, locate resources and become involved with educating others.

If you are concerned about the status of a particular child, whether your own, a neighbor’s or one you know in some other way, your pediatrician or school guidance are excellent resources to help you determine if there is an issue and how to help this child.

Contact a suicide Hotline for times when you are worried about a child being depressed, suicidal or self-injurious: 1-800-273-8255.

You can find strategies to cope with the anxiety and pressures that come with parenting or being a caregiver for a child who has mental health challenges in my new book, The Stress Response and by clicking here to sign up for more of my tips and and here for podcasts using DBT strategies to improve how you feel.

For more of my interview with Dr. Blau, click here.

Helpful Links

Awareness Day Web page:

List of Awareness Day Collaborating Organizations:

2011 SAMHSA Short Report:

Community Conversation:

How to be a Hero of Hope:

Blog post about the Twitter chat with the Surgeon General of the United States that Dr. Blau mentioned with links to the Storify archives of the chat:

Suicide hotline: 1-800-273-TALK

About  Gary M. Blau, Ph.D.

Dr. Gary M. Blau is a Clinical Psychologist and is currently the Chief of the Child, Adolescent and Family Branch of the Center for Mental Health Services.  In this role he provides national leadership for children’s mental health and is responsible for implementing the Comprehensive Community Mental Health Program, the Circles of Care Program, the National Children’s Mental Health Social Marketing Campaign, the National Technical Assistance Programs, and a wide variety of other programs designed to improve the lives of children and families.

Through the Director of the Center for Mental Health Services and the SAMHSA Administrator, he is also responsible for translating the President’s New Freedom Commission Report for children and families, and for implementing the children’s portion of the CMHS Action Plan.

Building Resilience

My daughter is finishing up her first year of elementary school.  Over the course of the year, I’ve anxiously asked her what she has to work hard to understand and she tells me school fun and easy.

Now as the first year comes to an end, I can see her self-confidence.  We all know that early experiences help shape our view of the world for much of our lives to come.  I had hoped that my daughter would learn that she is capable both socially and academically in early school experiences.

Continue reading “Building Resilience” »